When it comes to holidays we have to use certain precautions. Those precautions do not effect the other members nor the fun that we have. All the kids still get to enjoy the holidays like there was nothing wrong. All of the kids go trick or treating, we have a huge Thanksgiving meal, and we celebrate Christmas. We do have to do a couple of things different but we have put the changes as traditions in our family.
When it comes to Halloween, there is no scary costumes or face paints on Eric. If there is someone that is scaring children we walk ahead of Eric so he can't see it. They do not go alone, we all go as a family. Eric has to ask for the candy or say Trick or Treat. If he gets scared we are right there to comfort him and he can sit with one of us in the car while the others continue trick or treating. Becky, Eric, and Joseph get to have their candy left in their containers; the only change is they get five pieces of candy each day. We have to limit the sugar due to Eric's sensitivity to sugar. Becky and Joseph get used to this cause they know too much candy is never that good for you. I also tell people who are handing out the sodas to please no caffeine for Eric and the kids. Caffeine is never good for children to have. All of my kids are treated the same way and are very happy to celebrate this holiday.
Thanksgiving is often loud and crowded. I take extra care making sure that Eric is not over stimulated by often times having him come to the place we are having dinner later when the food is almost cooked. If we are visiting back home, certain family members take care on helping with Eric so I can help with the food. When it comes to eating, Eric sits by someone but has his own space. If he is in a strange environment he always sits next to me. He gets to eat what he wants and any amount he wants. Becky and Joseph play with the other children. Becky sometimes helps me cook or Eric does. Becky and Joseph eats the same way...no limits. Becky and Joseph also eat where ever they want to sit. We try to take the stress away from Eric to avoid triggers so that he could enjoy his dinner as well. If we are out he doesn't eat that well so we always bring home some left overs so he can enjoy his dinner at home when we get home. Both Becky and Joseph also get the left overs as well so that way they are happy to continue the party at home.
At Christmas time, we go to the parties like we are expected to. However, Eric does not like Santa that much. We never force him to take a picture with Santa. The other children can't wait for their pictures to be taken so we take their pictures. At the parties we watch Eric for the triggers and try to avoid them if we can. We eat and once again have to go plates for the children. Joseph plays with other children and is happy to do so. We keep an eye on him but let him play. Becky is always busy eating or playing but once again we keep an eye on her. With Eric he is always staying close to my side. The one big thing that we tell people who give us gifts NO BAGS for Eric. He thinks that bags are the seed of Satan. I do not understand him and bags but we always tell people wrap or leave unwrapped but no bags. The other children we let them have the bags. Last year we went to a Christmas tree farm to cut down our own tree. Eric found the perfect tree and was jumping up and down when we cut it down. He would often wonder looking at trees and we had to remind him to stay by us. But what turned out fun for him is now a family tradition and we all enjoy it. Becky and Joseph love decorating the tree, Eric doesn't like touching the tree so he hands me the ornaments instead. He loves the lights so they are left on when he gets home until he goes to bed. The other children love to turn off all the lights and watch the Christmas tree lights that we have. Eric also loves to watch Christmas movies and we have a lot so it is our tradition for the children to pick one out to watch every night. It is also our tradition to talk about the meaning of Christmas. On Christmas Eve the children can open present. Then on Christmas morning they open all their presents. If Eric wakes up at 6 like he does most of the time, he waits until the other children wake up very patiently. He never even goes near his presents. He comes to our room and wakes me up and we sit there just watching the tree. Once the other children are awake then the fun begins. We also take trips to see the lights around the area. If he falls asleep he falls asleep. We never yell at him for falling asleep while looking at lights. Christmas is the most important holiday for our family.
Easter is yet another challenge. Easter egg hunts are hard on him. He hates the crowds and the rushing and he hates being touched by strangers. Becky and Joseph love the adventure. Joseph tries to eat whats in the eggs while hunting for them. Becky goes after as many as she can. If Eric doesn't get alot of eggs most of the children around them share their eggs with him without being asked. Becky even shares her eggs and tries to help Eric out. At home when the Easter bunny comes it is another adventure for Eric and he loves it. Once again the baskets contain no bags or grass. It not only saves from a trigger but it also saves us from the mess. The other children never even notice that they don't have the grass in their baskets.
4th of July. The kids love it. They love looking at the Freedom Fest. They love going and seeing all the fun things and we do go as a family. The noise is sometimes loud for Eric but Becky also complains. We have a sit and stand stroller. I carry Rachael and Joseph and Eric get the stroller so that Eric feels safe. Next year we are looking at getting a wagon for Eric. So that way he knows people won't touch him and he is safe. When it comes to fireworks we do not go to where they are lighting them off. We go to a place we can see the fireworks without the noise and without the booms. The kids all watch their fireworks and feel that they are not being treated different. They all get to see the fireworks and they can all jump around and get excited and yet it is noise free.
I try not to have Eric's Autism rule our world and I continue to fit it into our traditions. The other children never even feel that because of Eric we can never do anything. We just do things our way so that we can have fun and enjoy the time we spend on Holidays with family. Never once do they say it is not fair because of Eric we can't do anything. Instead they say that we do everything that everyone else does. Eric's Autism does not change our lives but we do embrace it with our traditions. And not one person is left feeling like we an never do anything because of Eric being Autistic.
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